After reading the New York Times article yesterday on explicit sex scenes on TV and in movies (you gotta love it when the paper of record gets all saucy like that), we were reminded to watch Tell Me You Love Me on HBO last night. And we noticed that pretty much every episode so far has shown married-with-kids Katie putting on hand cream very matter-of-factly, all business-like, right before falling asleep in her sex-free marital bed. Which made us wonder, is that supposed to be one of those no-sex signifiers? We've always looked slightly askance at couples who have TVs in their bedroom--sure, you could watch Skinemax, but chances are The Colbert Report makes more nightly appearances... 

But now we're wondering whether visitors to our respective bedrooms would think the same about the tubes of hand cream on our nightstands (hey, we've got water-based lube in the drawer, too, you know!). And we hardly dare mention the laptops that sometimes get invited into bed. So, assuming you're just as judgmental as we are (if not, please lie and pretend you are to make us feel better), what are your personal no-sex signifiers, i.e. what would you never allow in your bedroom that many other couples do? A Blackberry on the nightstand? The day's dirty clothes thrown over a chair or on the floor? (Or the opposite: A pedantic insistence that everything be tidy before you get into bed?) Eating in bed? Farting in bed? Socks in bed? A dog named Socks in the bed? And what do you allow in the bedroom but feel slightly guilty about?