"Ecosexuals" are this year's metrosexuals--and just like with those well-manicured men of yore (yes, of yore...or hadn't you heard that the he-man is back?) there's a lot more trend-story fluff than there is actual information or analysis. We want to be like Nobel Al and be good green citizens, but if we read one more list of "Green Sex Tips!" that tells us to buy hemp sheets we're gonna puke. Do we look like ladies who date men whose dreadlocks reek of patchouli?! Seriously, we'd almost rather sleep on purple satin. And though we know that we really should switch to CFC lightbulbs, they're not exactly conducive to that all-important mood lighting--rimming under florescent light? Puh-lease. Which is why we couldn't have been happier when we came across this site's instructions on turning various members of the fruit and vegetable population into vibrating sex toys. Because sometimes a lifeless cuke just isn't going to cut the mustard, ya know?

Grocery-inspired vibes are perfect for the woman who doesn't want any more plastic in her life and whose budget doesn't stretch to pure silicone toys. (Of course, we think that every woman should splurge on at least one silicone buddy--come on, it's cheaper than a new pair of jeans, unless you buy your jeans at Tar-zhay--but we know that sometimes it's nice to have a little variety in your self-loving.) Just be sure to buy organic fruit and veggies, would ya? Because nobody needs carcinogenic pesticides where the sun don't shine