According to a Nielsen survey of "America's Most Lustful Cities," Denver is rockin' so don't come a knockin'. Also high up there in the lust stakes were San Antonio and, er, Cincinnati. Yeah, that'd be San Antonio, Texas, and Cincinnati, Ohio. And coming in below par? New York, L.A., and Vegas. Before we eat our hat regarding every mean thing we've ever said about the stuffed shirts in the fly-over states, we should note that the pollsters didn't exactly peer into bedroom windows to decide which metropolitan residents were getting it on with gusto. Nope, these rankings are based solely on over-the-counter condom and contraceptive purchases in the past year. And Denver, at the top of the list, had 189 percent more sales than expected for a market its size.

In other words, research is still pending on whether or not San Antonio is for spankers or Cincinnati is for gimps. But Denver would be perfectly within their rights to adopt as their new city slogan: "Denver: You Might Not Get Chlamydia!"