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 Photo of Carrie & Dan by Paul Severin We met Carrie Ann via our home-base website a few years ago, after our article on non-monogamy in New York magazine came out. She told us about her own unorthodox romantic situation and ended up as a featured subject in our Glamour article about women's sexual secrets: hers, of course, was her open relationship. (Her profile was in the print mag, but you can get the idea of the piece with the online version.) Well, if Glamour didn't let the cat out of the bag, her new boyfriend is currently liberating it on TangoMag.com. Dan Eldridge is publishing a series of articles on his "primary" relationship with Carrie called Marriage Without Monogamy (the third part of which just went live last night). Dan used to be her side dish, but is now her main squeeze, the primary partner she's intending to wed as a sort of business arrangement (for more on that, read part one). The first installment got an emotional response, including plenty of nasty virtual finger wagging... One nutbag even traced Carrie down on her MySpace page to wish her all the best while she burns in Hell. (Her profile is now private.) Of course, it's hard not to wonder how Dan can think he won't be replaced with a new side dish someday--or how the flames of jealousy don't shoot out of Carrie's ears, for that matter. But then again, maybe more alternative romantic deals have a better shot of lasting long-term, since so many "traditional" unions are destined to dissolve. From this end of our phone/email relationship with Carrie, she's always seemed quite secure, confident and happy about her love & lust choices, so we wish her and Dan the best! And if Dan keeps writing, we'll be able to see if that wish comes true. 3 CommentsLeave a comment |
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Now that is one good-lookin' couple!
By the way, a little birdie tells me Dan Eldridge has his very own website, where anyone can read his work. Hooray!
Click here, friends: PioneerContent.com
Besos! ---Your pal, Dan
It's fascinating how open relationships are so often seen as doomed at the start, and every time one fails it's taken as proof that open relationships just don't work. Whereas "monogamous" couples fail all the time as well, often because of cheating, and that's not seen as proof that monogamous relationships just don't work. Why not?
As a couple married over 25 years, our relationship can be either dynamic or static, but regarding sexual attitudes as they impact our relationship, sex, erotica, and fantasies keep it dynamic. I read the article and found it a mature examination of a dynamic relationship.
Given no two people in a relationship have the exact sexual 'genome', opening up to one another's views and desires allow the closeness they describe, as well as the insecurities wrought by such examination. From that exposure can come the strength, security and understanding they have discovered....or the potential to destroy the same. You can't get there any other way....unless your relationship in that matter is static...a mutual fear or lack of desire to examine it can have the same result, failure.
We do not have an open relationship, I don't think either of desires to go there...but everything up to that has been openly examined and experienced. No regrets, no negatives. We are closer because of sharing thoughts and experiences. We are more comfortable and secure in examining our feelings and confronting insecurities. We never crossed a line which we could not mentally handle, nor one unless we were both in agreement.
The "we could if we wanted" and the "been there done that" makes us a very close and secure couple in these matters. Does that in itself assure our longevity together? No...but it would never be a reason for departure.
Lastly...maybe we have not gone down the line far enough to have what "they have"...but we went as far as we desired, for now. Keep in mind, a sexual life examined can be one that is more fulfilling.