I started talking about safe sex practices for lesbians last week. I now want to tell you why--STDs, unlike the religious right, don't discriminate. So what activities put you at risk? The San Francisco City Clinic has a fantastic go-to guide to STD risks. The ones that women who have sex with women need to know about (warning: highly unsexy images in the links ahead)...
  • Performing oral sex on a woman. Herpes--rare, but possible, even if your partner has no active lesions. HPV--unknown, but possible in theory, since the virus lives in the skin and can be transmitted when warts aren't present.
  • Receiving oral sex. Herpes, for sure--both virus types travel freely between the mouth and the vulva.  HPV--again, unknown but possible.
  • Touching, rubbing, sharing sex toys. HPV, which can come from the vulva, vagina, cervix, anus--anywhere you want to play. It's unlikely, though, to pass warts on the fingers to genitals--the HPV strains that like the pelvis are particular to the genitals. Trichomoniasis, from contact with the vagina. Pubic lice (crabs), an oldie but a goodie. Chlamydia and gonorrhea--rare but possible with genital-genital contact. Syphilis, which is highly contagious in its primary form. Hepatitis B, passed easily in its most infectious form.

Some great folks are conducting research specifically on STD risks in lesbian couples. So more knowledge is still to come. But it's best to protect yourself from the risks we do know.



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After a break-up, do everything you can to avoid rose-colored hindsight. This may include playing that montage of fond memories over and over in the theater of your mind with the Dolby surround-sound system playing Muse or Maroon 5 on repeat. No good can come of this; you'll simply end up feeling more inadequate, lonely, and depressed. Instead, focus on your ex's faults. There must be at least one (besides their ability to live without you), even if it's just a malformed pinkie toe or a tendency to douse every meal in ketchup.
--From Buh Bye: The Ultimate Guide to Dumping and Getting Dumped






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