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 Photo via IDS 1. There's no such thing as too much cunnilingus. 2. Threeways rock. 3. Women aren't interested in casual sex. 4. Gentlemen should always pay for dinner. 5. Her vibrator might replace you in the bedroom. 6. With love and compromise, sexual incompatibility is always surmountable. 7. 69 is a great position. 8. Masturbation means you're not getting enough sex. 9. Guy's don't fake it. 10. Women can't ejaculate.
11. It's nice (and safe) to share your toys.
12. Bum sex is a pain in the ass. 13. Nice guys always finish last. 14. Your lover should be your best friend. 15. Men don't judge women who have sex on first date. 16. Women don't like to look. 17. Everyone has safe sex these days. 18. Women won't tell their friends if a guy is bad in bed. 19. Feet are for fetishists. 20. R&B makes a great soundtrack for sex. 21. Drunken dialing, ex sex and office romances are always bad ideas. 22. Sex is a failure if you don't climax. 23. Hickeys are for 14-year-olds. 24. Bisexuality increases your chances of a date on Saturday night. 25. Condoms protect you from everything. 26. The G-spot is the Holy Grail of sex. 27. Getting done by his girlfriend in a strap-on will turn a guy gay. 28. If you let him take dirty pictures, he will destroy the negatives. 29. Everyone knows how to kiss. 30. Women like guys who can go for hours. 31. If she's wet, she's into it; if she's not, she's not. 32. BDSM is for theater majors and computer geeks. 33. Deep-throating is key to a good blowjob. 34. There's no such thing as bad sex. 35. You can't get an STD from oral sex. 36. You have to be in the mood every time you start to have sex. 37. If he doesn't initiate sex, he's not attracted to her. 38. Masturbation is for singles. 39. When it comes to penises, the longer the better. 40. The missionary position is boring. 41. Sex = intercourse. 42. Women can't get pregnant during their periods. 43. Sexy lingerie makes a great gift. 44. Orgies are a thing of the past. 45. Abstinence-only education works. 46. The clitoris is just a tiny little external nubbin (rather than a deep network extending throughout the genitals). 47. Most women can orgasm during intercourse. 48. All men's nipples are erogenous zones. 49. The only way to lose your virginity is to engage in penis-vagina intercourse. 50. Everyone else has a much better sex life than you. P.S. Do we even have to tell you that Richard Gere gerbilgate was a myth--the dude's a Buddhist vegetarian, fer chrissake. 6 CommentsLeave a comment |
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In one sense, revenge sex—when you sleep with your ex's nemesis, roommate, sibling, parent, or pet in order to pay them back for dumping you--totally works: how could your ex not be grossed out / horrified / disillusioned / damaged for life? But unless your ex is a few peas short of a casserole, your cunning plan is sure to backfire, because they'll know exactly why you slept with their paste-eating dork of a sibling, and the most overwhelming emotion they will feel is deep, abiding pity for you.
--From Buh Bye: The Ultimate Guide to Dumping and Getting Dumped 
 
Em & Lo, more formally known as Emma Taylor and Lorelei Sharkey, are
the self-proclaimed Emily Posts of the modern bedroom.
Dr. Kate is an OB/GYN at one of the largest teaching hospitals in New
York City.
Send your queries to us at
emandlo@dailybedpost.com and drkate@dailybedpost.com. Want your sex dream analyzed by the Daily Bedpost dream expert? Email us at dreams@dailybedpost.com. Anonymity always honored! Check out Daily Bedpost on MySpace.com. |
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wait number 1? how do you know how much cunnilingus is too much?
Yeah, i'll fight that one, too.
re: #1
Some women (I don't know if it's true for all, but I'm pretty sure it's most) get REALLY sensitized after a climax, and can't stand to even be touched directly for a little while afterward. That's when it can be too much.
So yes, that's true.
What are negatives?
ummmmm..... well, actually the mother of a close friend of mine was working as a nurse in the ER the night richard was admitted. that was no myth. unless she's a goddamn liar, but she's a really sweet woman and i have a hard time finding a reason why she would make up the detailed story she told me about it. She had a genuine look of embarrassment the whole time she told it. i'm fairly confident. besides, wasn't cindy crawford spouting off about him refusing sex fairly regularly at one point in their marriage?
oh yeah, and deep throat actually IS the key to the perfect blow job. dont get me wrong. i have had some mind bending oral sex from women who cannot get it that far in and find other ways to make it enjoyable, but there is no doubt that the best ones go deep. nothing in this world compares to it. nothing. period. : )
When you're too drunk to feel anything anymore and you just want to go to sleep for chrissake because you've been doing this for what seems like hours.. That's too much cunnilingus.