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 Maybe it's the weather, but it seems like everyone's talking about casual sex right now. Our very own interns debated the topic, with Maddie giving casual sex an F grade and Erika giving it way high marks. And then over on Salon, Tracy Clark-Flory responds to a not-very-seasonal glut of abstinence books by making her case in defense of casual sex. And then the fair ladies at Jezebel respond to her, saying that Clark-Flory is only having semi-casual sex (though it seems like they're still agreeing with her, and what they actually seem to be saying is that Clark-Flory is enjoying casual sex in a responsible, grown-up way--which is kind of her point in the first place). So anyway, we'd like to know what you think about all this casual humping or not-humping... 6 CommentsLeave a comment |
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Why is the poll so binary? I happen to like both.
I'm wondering, personally, if everyone is missing a should-be-obvious point (though, admittedly, I'm not going to try and read all those links right now): Casual sex is great, unless casual sex is not what you want. For Maddie, it turned out, that it surely wasn't, and for Erika it apparently was. There really isn't a "wrong" point of view here, just a bunch of confused, horny folk who need to find themselves.
There is nothing wrong with two grown, consenting, fully understanding of the consequences adults getting together to relieve some frustrations! So long as you both know what you're in for and you are both on the same page as far as it NOT being a relationship, go for it!
Most swingers treat sex like a drug; they're just in it for the pleasure. Unfortunately, swingers tend to lose their ability to derive happiness from a solid, monogamous relationship because they try to compare the relationship to the pleasure they experience during casual sex which is just a quick fix.
Most swingers are really not that happy compared to that 5% who wait for true love which is why they need to treat sex as a quick fix pleasure drug.
That 42% and 43% speaks volumes about social mood and the presiding mind patterns.
why exactly does it have to be always 1 or the other? can't I say some people I'd do better with for casual sex(because let's face it, death might come sooner for one of us if we had to do 'til death do us part, but a relationship is better with others? and, novel thought, women are in fact sometimes able to figure out who they'd prefer what with? It kind of annoys me-ok, no kind of about it- that these articles always seem to say casual sex is damaging for women, and it's always women who are screwed up if they want casual sex. also, casual sex =/= necessarily swinging. There is middle ground. embrace it. or at least allow for the possibility that others might.
True love does wait, but it's only human to get lonely.. ..there's nothing wrong with having friends while u wait for the star of the show to show up.