12.18.2008  BY DR. KATE
Dr. Kate,

I'm embarrassed to ask, but is it normal to wet the bed during sex?

Too Moist

Dear Too Moist, 

The fluids you see may be one of three things: 

1) Your own lubrication with or without semen, which would be totally normal. Using lubricant (yay) or not using condoms (grrr) might increase how much fluid you see after. Either way, make sure you play on both sides of the bed to share who has to sleep in the wet spot.
2) Female ejaculate: not common, but not abnormal or unhealthy. Some women do, some don't.

3) Urine: this is more likely if your bladder is full before sex, and when you're fully relaxed (and having fabulous, full-body orgasms). Make sure you empty your bladder before intercourse and practice your Kegels to reduce the chances.

In general, there's no such thing as too much moisture during sex--friction is great for your running shoes, not so much for your vagina.

Have any of you worried about what the "wet spot" might be?


MirJean said:

Never had such an issue - however I could definitely see where it could be urine... Always empty mine before I get mine. If you know what I mean.


Personally, my wet spot (which is more like a small pond) is caused by my own ejaculate. It's actually so much that I bring a shower curtain and a beach towel to bed. It's a bit of a pain in the butt, but I tell him to "get dressed" while I "pull out the rain gear", and the bed's usually ready to go by the time the condom is on.

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