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Even though we're back stateside from London, we unfortunately couldn't make any Gay Pride parades yesterday. Looking at all the pictures and articles today from both the New York and San Fran events makes us bummed we missed such obviously fun public parties. It makes us want to get dressed up outrageously more (not just on Halloween), it makes us want to invest in glitter, it makes us so happy for such loving couples to finally tie the knot, and it makes us a little bit verklempt to see little kids with rainbow balloons dancing and smiling who have no idea what homophobia means. How could anyone be opposed to this?!

Okay, maybe the skin-tight gold lame thongs are a bit much for the young'ns, but it's no worse than what they see on the covers of women's and gossip mags on line at the grocery store. Intellectually, we get why some people feel they have to follow irrational religious decrees and why others' pea-sized brains can't grasp how something so wrong for them could be so right and, yes, natural for others; but emotionally, we just don't get it. Why infringe on anyone else's happiness? And frankly, who wouldn't want to put on a wig and some sparkly makeup and rollerskate on a sunny afternoon? Protest all you want, but you know that just like everyone has a feminine side and an inner alpha dog, there's also a little gay diva in everyone just dying to get out.

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Did you know that half of all unintended pregnancies are as a result of contraception failing or people not using their chosen method of contraception properly? That's why, when you look at sites like Planned Parenthood, they will tell you the effectiveness of a method when it's used either correctly or typically. We bet that when you hear statistics like this, you think, "Oh, that's just dumb teenagers who put on condoms inside out. I'm definitely in the 'correctly' category." Well, think again.

Let's take the Pill, for example, as it's probably the method most of you take--and it's also probably the method you think of as being least likely to "fail." When tests were done with computerized pill packs,  researchers found that women missed three times as many pills as they thought.

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aries (Mar. 21st-Apr. 20th)
Practice safe sex this Fourth: Wrap up your firecracker or else you might end up with some third-degree burns on your genitals.

taurus (Apr. 21st-May 20th)
The skies are clear so you can set your love rockets off. They should go off without a hitch. Expect lots of oooh-ing and ah-ing.

gemini (May 21st-June 21st)
Take a pass on playing with bottle rockets this week. You'll probably end up blowing your hand off...making masturbation that much more difficult.

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Photo via Splash

In not exactly shocking news, a recent survey found that women have more regrets than men when it comes to one-night stands. And the even less shocking explanation behind these results? Despite all our good advice to the contrary, most women continue to go into one-night stands hoping they will lead to a relationship (and men continue to let them think this might be the case). According to the survey, 80 percent of men and only 54 percent of women feel good after a one-night stand. The men tended to report feelings of sexual satisfaction, well-being, and improved self-confidence, while the women were more likely to feel used, ashamed, or as if they had let themselves down. Jeez, what is this, the 1950s?!

People, if we could all be a little more honest with each other, there'd be a lot more cheer in the world of casual sex. And this goes for you, too, ladies: how many times have you lied to yourself or a guy and said you're not expecting the sex to lead to anything? Another positive outcome: there would be fewer cases of women going to jail after seeking revenge via cattle branding on dudes who don't call after a one-night stand. Which is why we've always been fans of what we call the prenook: this is the casual sex equivalent of a prenup that verbally outlines both parties' expectations of the encounter.

06.27.2008  BY EM & LO
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A weekly round-up of our own favorite sex-related musings on the Web:

New York appears to be riddled with STDs, and New Yorkers are not using condoms any more. And when I read that, I said, out loud, holy crap, are you serious? As far as I can tell, STDs still exist, AIDS has not been cured and unplanned pregnancy is still an option. Maybe it's just New York--but I have sad and worried doubts about that.

Seriously, do people really not use condoms anymore? The idea seems absurd to me, and dangerous and frankly, a little stupid. Maybe it's because I grew up in the age of the terrible blossoming of AIDS and the renaissance of sexually transmitted diseases, and I spent all my school years being yelled at about herpes and syphilis, chlamydia and the clap, HIV and AIDS and unhappiness and death. They scared the hell out of us, in sex ed classes, in health classes, in gym. My mom even knew about the stuff you could get, above and beyond the whole baby thing, and I think I came away with the impression that it was actually, physically impossible to have sex without half a dozen health screenings and a condom. Maybe two.
more at ElasticWaist.com>>

06.27.2008  BY EM & LO
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The syllables have been counted and we have five winners of the "SEX: How to Do Everything" Haiku Contest, each of whom will receive a copy of "SEX"! Check out the honorable mentions after the jump, some of which would have won had their authors only known how to count. But first, the five winners, in no particular order: 

THE WINNERS

1. Kim from Brooklyn, NY:

turn to page sixteen
we attempted that one once
and then he farted.


2. Janet from Nashville, TN:

"Grounded?  No way, sis!
She'd have to tell him we found
It under her bed."


3. Jordan from Sommerville, MA:

Sex manual, great!
At our age I can use it
For good back support!


4. Mark from Pittsburgh, PA:

The Kama Sutra?
No Male G-Spot in that thing.
Em & Lo's book rules.


5. Adam from Boynton Beach, FL:

Blah blah blah blah breasts.
Blah blah blah blah vagina.
...Why men need a guide.


HONORABLE MENTIONS...

Em & Lo ask what's your favorite sex toy?; rabbit; butt plug; sex; Monarch; vibrator; daily bedpost; sex toy; orgasm; Sexuality; bullet; em & lo; Em & Lo ask what's your favorite sex toy?

The best of this week's blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #138? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you're all set.

This Week's Picks
I can only be what I am.
"It's strangely refreshing, to really submit and give up that control, and not have to make decisions."

Over the Edge
"He tells me to hold still, in that soft, controlling voice of his."

A Story Told Out of Order and Out of Character - Part 4
"You thought you could just come to my room and tease me?"

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Sugar Bank

Editor's Choice
A former slut examined

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot's Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

06.27.2008  BY EM & LO
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Next time you're engaging in some, er, "after hours" Googling, you might just be doing your bit to contribute to the definition of obscenity in America. At least that's what a defense lawyer in a Florida obscenity trial is hoping.

Here's the deal: when determining whether sexually explicit material is obscene, judges and jurors are supposed to make the decision based on whether the material violates "community standards." And this sneaky lawyer wants to use Google search data to prove that community standards are a little looser than people might admit to in church on a Sunday. He's defending a porn site operator in Pensacola, Florida, and he discovered that residents of that town are more likely to Google the term "orgy" than either "apple pie" or "watermelon." (What, nobody takes along home-made apple pies to orgies anymore?) But before you uproot yourself and move down to the Sunshine State, consider this: when it comes to Pensacola's Google search data, "orgy" is in turn out-ranked by both "Nintendo" and "Nascar." Now that's obscene.

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Em & Lo, more formally known as Emma Taylor and Lorelei Sharkey, are the self-proclaimed Emily Posts of the modern bedroom.

Dr. Kate is an OB/GYN at one of the largest teaching hospitals in New York City.

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